Texas Divorce Mediator
Peacefully Dissolving Your Marriage
There are two ways to handle a divorce in Texas: the contested way and the uncontested way. If you can avoid contested divorce, it will save you time and money in the long run. Also, an uncontested divorce can be beneficial for your children because they won’t have to go to court and may not detect as much animosity in your family.
In order to accomplish an uncontested divorce, you may need some help. This where the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC comes in. The attorney at this firm can guide you through the many decisions involved in the divorce process. You and your spouse can sit down together to discuss the different options while creating a satisfactory divorce decree.
What is Divorce Mediation?
Mediation is a legal process that allows participants to develop a resolution outside of the traditional courtroom setting.
Mediation usually involves the two divorcing parties, their lawyers, and a neutral third party who serves as the mediator. The mediator’s job is not to act as a Judge, but to facilitate help the parties come to an agreement themselves.
What a Divorce Mediator Can Do for You
A divorce mediator can meet with both you and your spouse and guide the conversation while helping you make collaborative decisions for your divorce. Mediation is only helpful if the spouses are on speaking terms and are willing to decide upon the terms of their divorce on their own. If one spouse is very opposed to the divorce, this method may not be the best choice for you.
A mediator can help you arrive at decisions concerning:
- Child custody
- Spousal support and alimony
- Child support
- Visitation
- Property division
- What is mediation?
- Things to Do to Prepare your Texas Divorce Case for Mediation
- Mediation Essentials for Divorce and Child Custody cases in Texas
What Are the Benefits of Divorce Mediation?
Mediation is a great way to work through a divorce if it is feasible in your situation. With mediation, you can carefully discuss all of your preferences and a divorce professional can advise you as to whether or not you are making a wise decision.
Some of the benefits of mediation include:
- Shorter time awaiting the divorce
- Less time in the courts
- Cheaper divorce
- The kids won’t have to deal with the tension of a court battle
- You and your spouse can arrive at decisions that are best for your family without deferring to a judge
- More comfortable and less formal environment
- High chance of success (90%-95% of mediation cases will settle through mediation)
- Increase control
- Creative solutions
- Confidential and more private
It is important to note that mediation is not for everyone or every case. In cases involving issues of abuse and do not believe that they can develop an amicable resolution may not benefit from this process. In such cases, it may be possible to request that the case skip mediation and go straight to court.
A family law case means giving up your life to a judge, right? In a divorce, your property and your relationship with your children are ruled on by a judge. Involved in a child custody case? Then be prepared for having parenting orders handed down by a stranger in a black robe. Are these statements accurate? For many people entering into a family law case, they are assumed to be. That is the rumor circling the family law world. Judges decide everything and people are powerless. If that’s how it is, why bother to even put any effort into the case? Just submit your evidence via mail and let the jail send you a decision back.
As a result of this line of thinking many family law parties begin their case with a defeatist attitude. Why bother even trying to participate in the case? All that happens is the judge ends up making the decisions for you, right? Wrong. That is not how your family law case is likely to come down. Rather, you and your opposing party hold all the cards in working together to resolve your conflict. It won’t be easy, but it is up to you.
Here at the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, we prize the ability to help our clients resolve issues amicably. Join us today as we discuss the hidden gem of family law- mediation.
What is mediation?
Mediation is allowing a third-party mediator to oversee formal settlement negotiations between you and your opposing party. These formal settlement negotiations are either half or full-day sessions. Typically, mediation occurs at the office of your mediator. The mediator will have you in one room and your opposing party in the other. From there, the mediator acts like a ping-pong ball bouncing back and forth between your rooms. After mediation, the aspiration is that a settlement will be reached.
Just that easy, right? Not so fast. There is a lot that goes into mediation. From preparation to selecting the right mediator for your case, the Law Office of Bryan Fagan prepares our clients for mediation daily. Our attorneys understand the importance of mediation in a client’s case. Contact one of our experienced family law attorneys to discuss your case with us. We offer free-of-charge consultations six days a week.
Differences between mediation and arbitration
Arbitration is an alternative dispute resolution process where two parties and their attorneys present a case to a neutral person. This neutral person is known as an arbitrator. The arbitrator would then decide about your case that is binding on the parties. The key difference between mediation and arbitration is that an arbitrator makes the decisions on resolution for the parties. Whereas in mediation the mediator only helps facilitate a discussion.
Why mediation is important
Without a doubt, the most prevalent notion about family law cases is that they involve fighting. We have all seen movies and television shows about divorce and child custody cases. One of the most prevalent themes in those shows is acrimony between parties. Parents fighting with each other. Children fighting with parents. Spouses fighting with one another. All the drama that we see in our lives daily in the home is brought to the family court. Indeed, many of our personal lives are not as tranquil as we would like.
There is some degree of disagreement and differences of opinion in family law cases. To say otherwise would be to be less than truthful. However, many family law cases do not involve nearly the amount of discord as you may have been led to believe. Many family law cases are fairly straightforward and lack the drama of even a basic television show.
One of the major reasons why family law cases in Texas are less dramatic is due to mediation. Mediation allows parties like you to submit to a process that values cohesion and negotiation. There is certainly room for argument in mediation. However, those arguments are typically more productive and unproductive. There is a set goal in mediation to settle the case. There are also deadlines associated with mediation.
Benefits to mediation
Mediation is not something that requires a great deal of money or a huge time commitment. This is opposed to going to court for temporary orders hearing or trial. In those circumstances, you are committing to paying your attorney to be with you in court for multiple days in some circumstances. There is also the time commitment involved in going to the courthouse and spending time in a hearing. Mediation is much shorter than a hearing and does not require a monetary commitment.
The setting of mediation is also more comfortable for most people. Very few people involved in a family law case look forward to going to court. It is a strange environment for those of you who have never been to a courthouse before. This contrasts with a mediation session that occurs in an office environment. The feeling of mediation is also much less formal. This usually puts people at ease and helps promote a more comforting environment.
The settlement reached in mediation is just as enforceable as a judge’s orders. The main difference is being able to arrive at these orders yourself rather than having to pay a judge to do so.
Selecting a mediator
In reality, you will not be aware of many family law mediators before your family law case. It would be odd, for example, if you knew a handful of family law mediators just from your daily life. For that reason, most people rely upon their attorney to make recommendations on what mediator to use. From there, you would need to decide on the handful of mediators recommended by your lawyer. Factors like cost, location, and experience of the mediator are all relevant to consider.
Once you and your attorney have selected your choice of mediator you would submit that name to your opposing party. Once an agreement can be had on a mediator you would select a date and time to appear at mediation. Scheduling mediation is important. You will want to schedule mediation before a major hearing date like temporary orders or a trial. If a mediator cannot be agreed to between you and your opposing party then a judge would play tiebreaker.
Since selecting the right mediator is so important it is crucial to hire an attorney who has experience with multiple mediators. The attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan. Have the experience you need to choose from the best mediators in Texas. Mediation is the difference between settling a case and proceeding to trial. Contact us to learn more about the mediation process in Texas.
The importance of deadlines in a mediation case
Many years ago, a fellow family law attorney casually mentioned something quite profound. More than anything, this was an observation of his. This gentleman observed that deadlines spur action. The way we approach a problem is different when we know there is a deadline attached to it. For instance, if you gave yourself the goal of losing 15 pounds you may not attack that goal all that hard. On the other hand, if you gave yourself the goal of losing 15 pounds in three months you would likely approach the goal differently.
It does not take an expert in logic to understand the reason why. When you attach a hard deadline to something the likelihood that you achieved the goal increases. This is because you know that time is limited. That mindset allows you to focus your attention more on important matters. You are less concerned with side matters that are less important and inconsequential.
Mediation in and of itself already presents you with a focused opportunity to achieve goals. Instead of having your attention diverted, mediation forces you to focus on the task at hand. Couple that with deadlines that are attached to mediation, and you know that all of your actions need to be geared towards achieving a certain goal.
What are the deadlines that are important in mediation?
There are two types of mediation in a Texas family law case. The first is temporary order mediation. Temporary orders occur almost immediately after a petition is filed. These orders provide you and your opposing party with ground rules for your family law case. Temporary orders can be negotiated upon and settled by you and your opposing party. Or the two of you may need to attend a temporary orders hearing. In that hearing, a judge would listen to testimony and consider other evidence. It is the judge who would issue orders that become temporary orders.
However, mediation allows you and your opposing party to focus your attention on the task at hand. Typically, a temporary orders mediation is set only a few days before the scheduled temporary orders hearing. This is intentional. Everyone in that mediation understands that if you cannot settle your case there it is likely a hearing will occur. Trips to the courthouse cost money and take time. Plus, a family court judge is less capable of coming up with fair orders in your case than you and your opposing party.
Final orders mediation
The other type of deadline for a family law case that impacts mediation involves a trial. After a child custody or divorce case at trial, they become necessary. This is true when you and your opposing party are unable to settle any outstanding issues. The same rule for temporary orders mediation applies to final orders mediation. Namely, everyone would prefer to avoid a trial if a reasonable settlement can be reached in mediation.
An advantage that you and your opposing party have in final orders mediation is that your temporary orders act as a guide. The guidance provided in temporary orders mediation tends to cause the final order to look very similar. This means that if you are successful at mediating for temporary orders then you have a high likelihood of being successful in mediating for final orders. Of course, proper preparation for mediation is important. Without that preparation, mediation will not be as fruitful.
The attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan are experienced at helping you to take advantage of the opportunities presented to you in mediation. We offer free-of-charge consultations six days a week where your questions can be answered in a friendly and hospitable manner. Contact us today to schedule a consultation.
Preparing for mediation
To the untrained eye, mediation may not seem like something you have to do all that much to prepare for. After all, does that mediation involve sitting in one spot with your attorney for multiple hours in a row? Wouldn’t this mean that you could simply prepare for mediation while you are still at mediation? The answer to this question is no. Unless you want mediation to be unproductive it is best to prepare for mediation beforehand.
One of the major concerns that people have going to court is the need to testify in front of other people. Very few of us are skilled at speaking in public and fewer still are excited at the idea of doing so. At the same time, simply going into someplace strange like the courthouse also makes that process uncomfortable. As a result, mediation is seen as a much better place to be able to present evidence.
The nice part about mediation is that you do not need to testify about anything there. You are not placed under oath. The contents of your settlement negotiations are not made public. However, it is still worthwhile to prepare for mediation. Do not assume that you will get a second chance to negotiate these matters. Rather, prepare for mediation as if it will be your last and best opportunity to conclude your family law matter. Here are some helpful pieces of information on how you can do just that.
Begin to collect documents
In an age where nearly everything is digital, having documentary proof of things is helpful in mediation. For instance, if you are going through a divorce then having documents related to your financial accounts is worthwhile to have in mediation. Your most recent account balances are a must. From there, you can also prepare for mediation by having a breakdown of how much of your account is community property versus separate property. Help your argument by being able to show that the math on these breakdowns is accurate.
In child custody matters coming up with a custody breakdown is important. The specific parenting schedule is something that many families overlook as far as importance is concerned. Do not rely upon a mediator to have all of this thought out for you. Rather, begin by keeping up with these subjects along with your co-parent. Having a calendar available is a handy tool to have at your disposal. Sometimes an online calendar that you both can update throughout mediation is worthwhile as well.
Finally, in matters related to community property division come prepared with title and purchase documents. Being prepared with these documents assists with strengthening your argument as to the community or separate property nature of various items. Not coming with documents to support your position puts you at a great disadvantage. Your spouse is less likely to negotiate with you when he or she does not understand where your numbers are coming from.
The mediated settlement agreement
Preferably, a settlement is reached in your case at the end of mediation. This means that any outstanding issues in your case have been settled. You would not need to attend a hearing or trial after this point. The settlements reached in your case would be memorialized within a mediated settlement agreement. The mediated settlement agreement is drafted by the mediator.
You and your attorney need to review the mediated settlement agreement before the conclusion of mediation. Any discrepancies between the settlement that you thought you reached and what is contained in the mediated settlement agreement need to be discussed. The agreement cannot be altered the following day for example. As a result, verifying with the mediator what has been agreed to is critical. Having an eye for detail is a helpful skill to bring into mediation.
The mediated settlement agreement is then turned into either a temporary order or a final order in your family law case. The settlement agreement is not drafted as a final product. Rather, the attorneys in your case will use that settlement agreement to draft final orders. As a result, do not expect the mediation to be the true last step in your case. There is still work to be done by you, your opposing party, and the attorneys in your case.
Drafting orders after mediation
In other words, do not walk out of mediation and assume that your case is over with. There is still work to be done by you, your opposing party, and your attorneys. Creating workable orders is the central component of this discussion. All the work performed by you and your opposing party and mediation will be for nothing if you are not able to turn the settlement into workable family court orders. These orders need to be clear and understandable by all parties. If not, they are not enforceable in the future.
This puts you in a situation where the orders are not worth the paper that they are printed on. That is to say, all the work and effort put into preparing for mediation would have been pointless. This is not a circumstance that you want to find yourself in. Having the right attorney means trusting that person to guide you correctly. This is true not only when it comes to matters related to negotiation but also how you can handle yourself before, during, and after your case.
Do not take your foot off the gas once mediation is over with. Rather, apply a keen eye for detail to the court orders that need to be drafted. The more time you spend on these court orders the better off you and your family are in the future. Many people have successfully settled in mediation only to find that problems exist with the orders that are drafted. Fixing orders after a family law case is over typically is not easy.
Do not sign orders until you understand them
A major mistake that people make during a family law matter after mediation is to sign orders they do not understand. This occurs for many reasons. First, people are genuinely fatigued after engaging in mediation and a lengthy family law case. Imagine taking a test over many days. The first day you have a lot of energy. Day number two you start to fatigue. On the third day writing in any answer that sounds plausible is succumbing to the fatigue of test taking.
This same issue happens in a family law case. While you may have been engaged fully at the beginning of your case the fact is that by the end of mediation, your reserves are spent. In other words, you just want to get the case over with. Nevertheless, it is important to ignore this thought and proceed with an eye toward detail and doing what is best for your family. Do not give in to the temptation to give up too soon.
On the other hand, you need to focus even more on your case during this time. Blitzing through the last stages of mediation just to say that you are done with the case would be a mistake. Rather, spend more time looking through your court orders and focus your attention on the details of your case. You will be happy that you did so. Most importantly, you and your family in the future will be extremely happy that you did this.
Negotiation with your opposing party outside mediation
What you should not assume is that the only place where negotiation occurs is in mediation. Mediation is indeed a formalized settlement negotiation circumstance. There are many reasons to be optimistic that mediation can work out to be successful. However, this does not mean that mediation is the only appropriate place to negotiate with your opposing party.
In fact, one of the major mistakes that people in your circumstance make is to only negotiate around mediation. For example, suppose that you are involved in a divorce case. The instinct many people have is to leave their spouse alone during the case and only handle negotiations immediately before mediation. This is a major mistake in most circumstances. Taking this perspective guarantees you are losing time that could be better spent working through the major issues of your case.
The experienced family law attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan understand the importance of mediation and how to get the most out of this important stage of your case. However, it is crucial to understand that negotiation takes place throughout a productive family law matter. Our attorneys are skilled at helping you take advantage of every opportunity available to reach reasonable settlement conclusions with your opposing party.
Where do you go when mediation is not successful?
While mediation is successful for many parties who engage in the process it is not for everyone. In those circumstances where you have difficulty settling your case there are additional options for you to pursue. For one, you should continue to negotiate with your opposing party until you are unable to do so any longer. It is not uncommon for parties to arrive at a settlement literally on the courthouse steps before a hearing or a trial. Give negotiation a chance until it is not possible for you to do it any longer.
Next, you can try and be honest with your opposing party to see if another round of mediation may be successful. Perhaps one of you did not prepare adequately for mediation and thinks that a second try may allow you to arrive at a long-term settlement. There is nothing wrong with trying to go this route with your opposing party if he or she is agreeable to it. Just be sure to mediate as conscientiously as possible the next time.
Finally, when negotiation does not work a hearing or trial is your last resort to resolve your family law matter. Prepare diligently for a trial or hearing by falling back on your preparation for mediation. Much of the time the preparation you put into mediation helps prepare you for a hearing or trial. Working with an attorney who is equally skilled at the negotiation table and in the courtroom is a tremendous advantage to have.
Final thoughts on mediation
You truly can get as much out of mediation as you put into it. Without a doubt, parties in your position settle their cases all the time even when they are less than optimistic about their chances at success. However, being able to prepare diligently for mediation is key. The more you can work with your opposing party before mediation the greater the likelihood that you can avoid a trial or hearing later in your case.
The attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan thank you for spending time with us today on our blog. If you have any questions about the material, you have read through please do not hesitate to contact us for a free-of-charge consultation. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan is here to serve our community and we take a great deal of pride in being able to do just that.
Let an attorney at the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC assist with your case. With the right Texas lawyer on your side, you may be able to arrange the different terms of your divorce decree correctly and effectively.